Crochet Comedy Courtesy CWA

I was going through some old CWA magazines the other day and came across these two little 'stories' which I thought I'd pass on.

Comforting quilt

After Sunday school a mother asked her small daughter what the lesson was about. The daughter answered "Don't be scared, you'll get your quilt," Needless to say, the Mum was perplexed.
Later in the day, when she met the minister, the mother asked him about it. He explained, "Be not afraid, thy Comforter is coming".

Telling the Truth

An elderly couple, childhood sweethearts, married and settled down in their old neighbourhood, are celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary. They walk down the street to their old school. They hold hands as they find the desk they had shared, where he had carved, "I love you Sally".
On their way back home a bag of money falls out of an armoured car, practically at their feet. She picks it up but they don't know what to do with it so they take it home. There she counts the money and finds it is fifty thousand dollars. The husband says, "We've got to give it back," but she says, "Finders, keepers," and hides it in the attic.
The next day two FBI men go from door to door looking for the money. They show up and say, "Pardon me, but did either of you find any money that fell out of an armoured car yesterday?" She says, "No." Her husband says, "She's lying. She hid it in the attic." She says "Don't believe him, he's getting senile."
The agents sit the man down and begin to question him. One says "Tell us the story from the beginning." The old man says, "Well, shen Sally and I were walking home from school yesterday ..." The FBI guy looks at his partner and says, "We're outta here."